I Really Just Need To Express This.

See I met this girl, and she amazing. The way I feel about her is diffrent then anything before…

I am not one to believe in a ‘one and only’, or ‘a soulmate’, but shes pretty close. I want to tell here but I feel like their is to much in the way of that, or I am just making it hard on myself. I mean, I know I am to busy for a realationship ‘assuming she like me back’ and Right now she is doing her own thing to take care of her self- which I admire SO much. Now their is distance between us. I still care for her and I just love who she is, y’know?

I always thought the girl I fell for would be this woman who loved nature as much as I do, who would be understanding of my situation and my own mental illness. she would have- this smile, and a heart of gold, with a passion that she chases after to achive, and it would just be a bonous is she also liked star trek.

Ofcorse with the understanding my deam girl is only in my head, I would look for some of these charistics in others, and boy did I hit the jack pot. just thinking about her makes me smile. She is an amazing person and I just want her to know that.

Before she moved I thought about asking her out over the summer cause I would only have one more semester, however she is just starting her life and will be starting college soon, so while shes amazing maybe now is not the time, nor is summer… 

While I know their are probably other girls out their like this, I still find myself thinking I will never find someone like her. I just want to hug her and never let go, but I know I need to. So when we hug good bye I let go every time. 

I still want to tell her though even if she doesn’t like me back, or we can’t realisticly be together I just want to TELL HER. We will see, maybe, just maybe everything might work out.
UPDATE: I’m dating this wonderful human being now. ❤

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